Great Grammar Editing Assignment 1

Grammar Editing

Why do you believe CCOM would provide you with the type of osteopathic medical education you are seeking? (1500 characters)

According to Dr. Goeppinger, if healthcare is my calling, Midwestern University is my home. I am certain that Chicago College of Osteopathic Medicine will provide me with precisely the type of osteopathic medical education I seek because of its dedication to fostering innovation in medicine and teaching and success producing primary care doctors of integrity.

I especially look forward to bridging traditional classroom learning and real-life clinical experience at the Clinical Skills and Simulation Center. The center will serve as a place to master medical procedures and collaborate closely with peers from other disciplines. In addition, attending CCOM would grant me the opportunity to contribute to the development of a dynamic institution through research and further my quest to provide excellent primary care. My motivation to pursue general medicine stems from the declining number of primary care physicians.

This motivation is reinforced by witnessing poverty and lack of care both in my hometown and while serving San Francisco General Hospital’s disadvantaged patient population. Doctors under increasing pressure to see more patients can only result in less accurate diagnoses, lower quality treatment plans and less time for doctors to make a human connection with their patients. Earning the opportunity to study at CCOM will allow me to accomplish our shared objectives of making deep connections with our patients and exemplify the “Midwestern difference”.

Why should CCOM accept you into this year’s class? (1500 characters)

Chicago College of Osteopathic medicine should accept me into this year’s class for my demonstrated commitment to osteopathic medicine and cultural diversity and perspective I will bring to the program. I came out to my family 10 months ago and I was forced to abruptly uproot myself to Seattle, Washington in order to live my truth. I am an Armenian Christian female who identifies as a lesbian.

Navigating towards a career in medicine from a disadvantaged background was incredibly challenging yet rewarding. Being an active member of cultures that have been historically oppressed instilled an appreciation for hard work and commitment to reaching my goals. Despite these recent financial and emotional set-backs, my determination to pursue osteopathic medicine was reaffirmed. My fearlessness and ability to rebuild and progress regardless of external circumstances will make me an excellent candidate.